I live in a zoo! Never mind the fact that I have four children (zoo enough), I also have a cockatiel named Misty, a cat named Valentino, and I’m “borrowing with an option to own” a chocolate lab named Sage. (Cricket moved with Natacha to the Dumb Friends’ League - same reason - too dumb to understand where to potty!) The good news is that none of these animals pee or poop on the carpet in my house. They’re also very low maintenance, needing only food, water, and a little attention. The bad news is that none of them really like each other.

Actually, the cat is rather fond of the bird - just not in a very friendly way. He’s always wanted a bite of those pretty yellow feathers. The cat literally hates the dog. He hisses and hunches his back to the near-breaking point when the dog walks into the same room with him. (This situation has improved greatly in the last couple of days, but I’m not planning a “play date” for the two of them any time soon.) The dog hasn’t even noticed that the cat exists except when the cat chased the HUGE dog down the stairs, dog crying the whole way into Rowland’s office. I’ve been consoling the dog for being in a new home with lots of children and activity around. I’ve been consoling the cat for having to live with an enormous dog of which he is obviously terrified. Now, I’m consoling the bird!

A few minutes ago, I was in the basement working out when I heard William’s bird going crazy. I listened for a minute, but Misty got more and more upset. I just knew that the cat had figured out a way into the cage. The bird was frantic! I jumped off of the exercise gear and ran into William’s room to discover that the dog had simply walked into the room. The bird went nuts, obviously terrified of the huge animal. Docile dog was scared out of the room by all of the commotion so I took Misty out of the cage. As I held her up underneath my neck, her heart was beating out of her chest. She was making this crying noise as she dug her little beak and head into my neck. I petted her and talk softly to her until, after about five minutes, she was calm once again. In the middle of my holding the bird, I realized that I WAS CONSOLING A FREAKIN’ BIRD!!!!! That is what my life has come to!

If you’d like to visit the Parker Zoo, admission is free, but please, please, don’t bring any animals with you. This zookeeper is done!