I just don’t get it! I’ve really tried to understand this whole Facebook phenomenon. I’ve tried to participate by accepting invitations, extending invitations, even writing a thing or two on people’s walls. I’ve taken quizzes that were sent to me. I’ve looked at people’s pictures and at who knows whom. I just don’t get it! Do you have to spend hours just going from one person’s page to the next checking out “what they’re doing right now?” When is the appropriate time to post what you happen to be doing at that exact moment? How often do you share that information? Who really cares? If I want to know what you’re doing, I’ll call and ask you or send you an e-mail. If you want to know what I”m doing, you can call and ask me. (I probably won’t answer the phone because I’m either busy doing something or I don’t feel like sharing what I’m doing! But you’re welcome to try!)

Just today, someone in China wrote on my wall “Kitty…..Really…..” Obviously, he’s responding to something that I wrote on his wall, but I checked back through his wall, and I can’t find anywhere where I wrote anything. Maybe he’s responding to something I wrote on someone else’s wall. Either way, I have no clue what his message means and no way to track it down. What kind of system of communication is that?

And no offense to those who are my age or older, but what in the heck are you doing on Facebook? It has to be like “new math,” something we’re not even supposed to understand! We’re not going to be young and cool no matter how many friends we have or how many people write on our walls. (What is a “wall” anyway?) Give it up!

I guess I’ll keep accepting friend requests since I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. After all, most of the people are already my friends anyway. Beyond that, I don’t know what else to do. I feel like I’ve entered a foreign world every time I get on Facebook, a world where one could waste hours and hours just finding out what everyone’s doing right now. In my opinion, they don’t need to post what they’re doing. If they’re on Facebook, they’re wasting the same hours I am!

I love to fly! It’s quiet. There’s no telephone. I can’t do laundry or pick up the house. For the most part, I’m “trapped” in a place where I can’t feel guilty about just sitting and doing nothing. Before boarding a plane, I always stop and buy the latest People magazine and some other celebrity “crap magazine.” I devour the junk! My favorite part of the People is doing the crossword puzzle. It’s the only crossword puzzle that I can successfully complete. (So much for that great degree in English - sorry, Daddy!)

I’m not afraid to fly, and even the turbulence doesn’t bother me anymore. I LOVE IT!

While preparing to take off from Little Rock a couple of days ago, though, I experienced real fear, knots-in-my-stomach kind of fear. I wasn’t afraid of flying, but I was definitely afraid of the man sitting next to me! He was sitting there quietly with his IPod in his lap, his ear pods in his ears. As the flight attendant came by, she asked him to turn off all electronics. He showed her that the IPod was turned off so she asked him to remove his ear pods during takeoff. When she walked off, he removed his ear pods and looked at me and said, “Now I’ll be able to hear the screaming.”

Half-laughing, I asked, “The screaming?”

Weirdo: “You aren’t going to scream, are you?”

Me: “No…….” Major questioning look on my face……

Weirdo: “Shit happens.”

Me: To myself, “Our Father who art in Heaven……..”

The dilemma…….Is Weirdo just a weirdo or is he some kind of fanatic who knows that this plane is NOT taking off? Do I pull the flight attendant off to the side and tell her that I’ve just had a strange, perhaps foretelling, conversation with Weirdo? I’m picturing the plane’s being delayed, police taking Weirdo and me off the plane to question us, passengers being angry because Weirdette has appeared. I decided to pray and pray and pray and pray until we reached our cruising altitude.

At this point, Weirdo offered me a Milk Dud, my favorite candy. New dilemma…..If I eat that Milk Dud, will I scream?

There is a growing interest in Oprah’s latest spiritual endeavor that is causing much uproar in the Christian community. As I have thought about this new path that she has taken and others are following as well, I have come up with a few ideas of my own on the subject. Specifically, Oprah is following a man named Eckhart Tolle’s belief system as outlined in his previous book The Power of Now and his newest book A New Earth. She is offering an online class (not an online church) with Mr. Tolle as the teacher as she sits next to him discussing his ideas.

If you are a Christian, you probably know that the Bible teaches that we are not to follow any man or any man’s teachings. We have to know the Word, and if the Holy Spirit lives inside of us (and He does), He will give us the discernment that we need. And we should be praying for those who are following ALL of the false teachers in the world.

Of course, I totally disagree with Oprah and with Tolle, but she is not someone to whom I’ve ever looked for spiritual wisdom or guidance. She’s a TALK SHOW HOST who’s obviously very misguided, but so are the Tom Cruises and John Travoltas who preach Scientology and the Richard Geres who preach Buddhism and the Shirley Maclaines who teach reincarnation…..The list goes on and on.

A video has recently been placed on YouTube (youtube.com/watch?v=JW4LLwkgmqA) put together by Our Eyes Are Open Ministries. After searching online, I was not able to find anything about this ministry, but the video it has produced calls this new movement “the largest church ever,” the “Church of Oprah,” and states that viewers watching Oprah and Tolle’s online class were put into a “mass trance.” (To me as I observed this “mass trance,” it was simply a moment of meditation, similar to what has been practiced in other religions for centuries.) The video presents another book called Don’t Drink the Kool-Aid - Oprah, Obama, and the Occult by Carrington Steele. According to www.csteeleonline.com, this book documents Oprah’s evolution into the person she is today and how she arrived at her current belief system.

To me, the most disturbing (and truthfully, irritating) part of the video was that it denounces Barak Obama because Oprah has come out in support of him. The Steele web page says that it his “sudden rise in power” is “creepy.” The Kool-Aid book ties Oprah, Obama, and the Occult together and suggests that the same brainwashing techniques used on POWs are being used on Oprah’s show. (Obviously, the Kool-Aid reference is to the Jim Jones’ Mass Suicide.) Just recently, I have seen Obama interviewed talking about his personal relationship with Jesus, his conversion, and his seeking the Lord (his terminology). Once again, the Christian organization that put together the youtube video, while full of great intentions, has attacked a fellow believer because an unbeliever, Oprah, supports him. Wonder how many unbelievers supported George W. or Bill Clinton, both of whom are professed followers of Christ.

We don’t need to fear Muslims or Jews or Buddhists or Scientologists or Oprahs or whomever. Since the beginning of time, people have denied God, and many of those who have accepted God have denied His Son. As Christ followers, God has not called us to take up arms against those who disagree with us. The call is the same as it has always been — We are to love God with all of our hearts and love others. It’s God’s responsibility to draw people to Him. We don’t have to protect people from false prophets (although speaking the truth in love is a definite option!) or try to bring down those who are preaching lies.

I would challenge those of us who call ourselves Christians to pray for Oprah and for Tolle and pray for those who are still seeking the Truth yet looking in the wrong places. Then, we need to get up and LOVE GOD and LOVE OTHERS REALLY WELL!!!!!

What a great weekend with good friends!! Dave and Carrie flew in from San Jose Friday night and flew out EARLY this morning. We had such a blast! They’re the kind of friends you don’t see for months and don’t talk to very often, but when you get back together, you’ve never missed a beat!!

Carrie, Rowland, and I are trying to get them to Parker. We looked at some beautiful, truly amazing homes to get an idea of how much more they can get for their money here versus in San Jose. Carrie and I both fell in love with an amazing $2.2 million home - with the 4500 square foot basement UNfinished! I’d have to sell every piece of furniture I have and buy all new. I felt like Tiny Tim walking around a giant’s home. The inside was beautiful rock and dark wood with every convenience you could possibly imagine. It even had a laundry room the size of my bedroom on the main floor with a small one upstairs in case you had a few things you wanted to throw in before you went to bed, I suppose. Carrie said that the main one was for the maid to do the laundry, and the upstairs one was for anything you personally wanted to wash! The pantry was nicer than any room in my whole house (and I’m not trashing my house!). You’d need to buy 50 bottles of wine just to begin filling the built-in wine racks. As we walked away with Carrie’s eyes lit up, she was saying, “I could soooo picture myself in that house!” Always the good friend, I brought her quickly back down to reality, and we headed back to the “slums!”

We went to our favorite restaurant Saturday night, Terra Cotta, in Old Littleton. Fabulous food, cozy environment, delicious wine AND VANILLA CREME BRULEE!!!!! The owner is a friend and treated us to a glass of dessert wine and a glass of port after all else was done. Needless to say, we were all happy that Rowland was in the driver’s seat! He kept passing the extra wine off to Dave. Wonderful, wonderful night!!!

We also made a decision on our next cruise and are ready to book! It’s an eight day/seven night cruise to San Juan, Puerto Rico, St. Maarten, and St. Thomas cruising out of Miami on the Freedom of the Seas Royal Caribbean ship. There are a gazillion things for the kids to do on the ship from rock climbing, ice skating, in-line skating, a movie theater, great shopping (for the girls and me!), swimming, an off-boat dock with seadoos, etc., etc., etc. And the most important thing for me is that there are Kids’ Clubs and Teens’ Clubs as well as on-ship babysitters, a spa for my every other day massage, and a work-out room! Can’t wait for March 22nd to get here!!!!!

Great memories were made this weekend, and I’ll be reliving them for a while!!!

Dave and Carrie on the Cruise in February

Rowland and I on the Cruise in February

Do you ever have those days when you just want to do absolutely nothing? I’m there right now. Trouble is that I have an appointment to get my hair done in 22 minutes, and I’m not even close to being ready. I stayed out too late last night at the Bon Jovi concert (which was AWESOME!) with Rowland and the boys. (I’ll post pictures and scoop later.) I woke up in the middle of the night with a headache (so I can’t drink three beers anymore!). Jia wants to “tell me something” every three and one half minutes. KeKe and William were sooo excited about Cowboy Day at school. They posed for a million pictures, causing them to miss the bus. (My fault - I was enjoying playing photographer instead of mommy!) Driving them to school made me a little more off schedule. I talked on the phone FOREVER (as usual) with my bud Amy this morning, then my husband. Now, instead of getting ready to go, I’m typing on the computer. I’m supposed to drop Jia off at the church in 3 minutes. It takes 15 to get there. Hmmmmm…….. Think I might be late! Okay, here goes……I’m off and running - LATE, of course!!!

Rowland and Grant went to Chili’s Monday night for a beer and some guy time. (I don’t really know what that means, but I’m guessing it’s similar to girl time without the shopping, hair, and makeup talk!) Since it was happy hour, Chili’s was having a buy one beer and get the second one for free. After explaining the special to the guys, chickie asked if they wanted a small beer or a large beer. The large beer was only 80 cents more so, always looking for a bargain, the guys went with the large. Once their beers were empty, they asked for their bill to leave. Both beers were charged on the bill. Assuming that there was a mistake, they pointed this out to the chick. She explained to them (an hour late and a few dollars short) that the special only applied to the small beers. Excuse me?

Yes, chickie needs the stupid sign BEFORE she sells anyone anymore beers!

I live in a zoo! Never mind the fact that I have four children (zoo enough), I also have a cockatiel named Misty, a cat named Valentino, and I’m “borrowing with an option to own” a chocolate lab named Sage. (Cricket moved with Natacha to the Dumb Friends’ League - same reason - too dumb to understand where to potty!) The good news is that none of these animals pee or poop on the carpet in my house. They’re also very low maintenance, needing only food, water, and a little attention. The bad news is that none of them really like each other.

Actually, the cat is rather fond of the bird - just not in a very friendly way. He’s always wanted a bite of those pretty yellow feathers. The cat literally hates the dog. He hisses and hunches his back to the near-breaking point when the dog walks into the same room with him. (This situation has improved greatly in the last couple of days, but I’m not planning a “play date” for the two of them any time soon.) The dog hasn’t even noticed that the cat exists except when the cat chased the HUGE dog down the stairs, dog crying the whole way into Rowland’s office. I’ve been consoling the dog for being in a new home with lots of children and activity around. I’ve been consoling the cat for having to live with an enormous dog of which he is obviously terrified. Now, I’m consoling the bird!

A few minutes ago, I was in the basement working out when I heard William’s bird going crazy. I listened for a minute, but Misty got more and more upset. I just knew that the cat had figured out a way into the cage. The bird was frantic! I jumped off of the exercise gear and ran into William’s room to discover that the dog had simply walked into the room. The bird went nuts, obviously terrified of the huge animal. Docile dog was scared out of the room by all of the commotion so I took Misty out of the cage. As I held her up underneath my neck, her heart was beating out of her chest. She was making this crying noise as she dug her little beak and head into my neck. I petted her and talk softly to her until, after about five minutes, she was calm once again. In the middle of my holding the bird, I realized that I WAS CONSOLING A FREAKIN’ BIRD!!!!! That is what my life has come to!

If you’d like to visit the Parker Zoo, admission is free, but please, please, don’t bring any animals with you. This zookeeper is done!

I’m lying down with Jia, the child who asks me every day if I will take a nap with her. She’s so like her momma, LOVES to take naps! We were cuddled up on the bed, but for some reason, she didn’t want to take a nap. She kept sobbing and sobbing. Eventually, I fell asleep. Just as I fell asleep, my little princess awakened me, “Mom-mom, Mom-mom….” “What, Jia?” Crying, “You’re ruining my entire life.” What????????

Rowland flew in at noon today, and I was sitting at the airport 30 minutes early waiting for him! It was so great to see his face walk through the customs door!! We picked each of the kids up from school and gave them “surprises” from Costa Rica. It’s gotta make his heart feel good when he hears, “Daddy!!!!” He is a well-loved daddy.

After we picked everyone up, we came home to take a short nap before he and Carson headed out for the Van Halen concert in Denver tonight. William’s spending the night with a friend so it’s just the girls and me.

I’m stir crazy from being home with the stomach bug for two days. (Yes, I was sick while he was gone! Carson gave it to me.) The kids were great, though, and let me lie on the bed most of the time. Tonight, I’m feeling better and wishing for an evening out with good friends, lots of laughter, and a little too much wine! Oh, well, I’ll have to settle for lying in the bed in my pjs, drinking a Diet Dr. Pepper, and watching more lame television! Tomorrow night, though, I’m heading out with my honey for some good times!!

I am happy to report that the short marriage of Valentino and Natacha has ended. While Natacha was a good wife who enjoyed chasing and wrestling with her husband and would even give him the occasional bath, she was just plain stupid. I’d say she was also a little (or a lot) boring! When we would call Natacha, she would run the other direction. When we took her outside to potty, she would do a great job! The problem was that she was too stupid to realize that she had to potty ONLY outside. In the 3 months we had her, she only made it one full day without potty-ing in the house. One day!

Eventually, we began to blame Valentino for Natacha’s mistakes. It seemed incredible that one little dog could be that stupid! We feel certain that this tense situation caused major problems in Valentino and Natacha’s marriage (as it helped mine very little!).

Finally, Natacha (and her even more stupid owner) realized that she just didn’t have the brain capacity needed to become a member of the Smith family. The rest of us, after all, understand where it is appropriate to potty and where it isn’t! This is just a basic tenet of the Smith Creed. So, after much counseling, Natacha moved to the Dumb Friends League (the perfect name for a home for her). Our only regret is that we didn’t wait until Nana could take her since Nana’s greatest enjoyment in life is taking dogs to “the pound!” Sorry, Nana!!

As the Eurythmics sang, “Watch Me Walking Out the Door!”